Incoming Crush

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Cupid, the chubby deity of love and lust with serious mommy and relationship issues, is mercurial at best, cruel at worst. Hate your ex? Probably his fault for making you fall for them in the first place.

Reclaiming My Time

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The White Rabbit from the classic Alice in Wonderland. The poor guy could have benefitted from some Xanax, a better job, and less time around his mercury-addled friends.

HipHopHath

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Hathor was an Egyptian cattle goddess of cosmetics, dance, sexuality, and motherhood. She's usually represented in cow form but could also be a lioness, a cobra, or a sycamore tree because ancient Egyptians were an eclectic bunch.

Walkies

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Little Red Riding Hood is all grown up and taking no shit from creepy wolves or hermit grannies.

Oldilocks

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Golidlocks was originally a tale simply called The Three Bears, in which a miserable old woman basically ruins these poor bears' lives and enjoys doing it. Why? Why not, I guess. This was entertaining in the 1800s.

Pan

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This is Pan, the Greek musical woodland god of shepherds, flocks, and fertility. He was also a bit of a masculine jerk, but which gods weren't in those days?

Bonding Time

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Nothing but the best for Medusa's baby girl. Don't worry, the kids will be fine. Probably. IDK.

Lady Sekhmet

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The Egyptian goddess of war and medicine, relaxing in her happy place with her alter ego, the cat goddess Bastet.

Horus

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Horus is the Egyptian warrior god of the sun and moon, and arguably the most important of them all (according to him). Pictured here at his first rave, when he still knew how to party.

Babi, Baby!

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Babi, groovin' his way to the Duwat, or Egyptian underworld. He's a bad dude, but super slick. His hobbies include gorging on entrails and long walks in the gloom.

Am-heh

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Am-heh, the Egyptian god of being really, really awful. He was called 'Devourer of Millions' at work, but his friends knew him as Jesus Quintana.